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Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Retro Movie Review: Bitten

Bitten

Year: 2008
Length: 1 hr 28 min
Starring: Jason Mewes (human), Erica Cox (vampire)


Vampire Weaknesses:
- Sunlight
- Wooden stake through the heart
- Being turned isn't 100%. Some people come back sentient and some don't.


Vampire Traits:
- Fresh human blood only (no blood bags)
- Messy eater
- Daily feedings
- Feeding and sex are intermingled
- Super strength and speed




Personal Rating:
Okay



Basic Premise:
Jack is an overnight paramedic who spends his nights scrapping junkies off the sidewalks. His girlfriend dumped him and his thinks his life is a dead end. Then he meets Danica sprawled in an alley covered in blood. He takes her home, gets her clean then finds out she's a vampire. Now he's in a bind. She means a lot to him but she has a serious addiction to human blood. Can true love overcome a little vampirism?



Review:
Holy crap! It's Jason Mewes. Yup Mr. Jay from Jay and Silent Bob himself. He did a pretty good job. It's wasn't a show stopping performance, but it wasn't horrible either.

Romantic, Comedic Horror. How often do you see those three intertangled with each other? And this isn't my sick sense of humor talking. They had Barney-esque music while Jason Mewes was cleaning up dead bodies. It was really funny.

I couldn't take this seriously. I think half way through the production they decided to skip the horror and go for a comedy but they still had the vampire to deal with.

It's highly sexualized, but like I said above, the sex is mixed with blood. It wasn't horrible. Let's just leave it at that.


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